All of your wealth pales in comparison to MY riches: a profound enjoy for my spouse and daughter and likewise my narcotic empire worth $300 billion.

Image: Shutterstock/ Dragon Images

Well Jeff Bezos, you’ve been named the new world’s wealthiest person, so I guess congratulations are in order. That is, they would be, if not for one simple fact: you are not the world’s wealthiest person. I am.

That’s right, Mr. Bezos, all of your billions ($ 90.6 of them, according to Forbes) pale in comparison to MY wealth. You ensure, Jeff, I am rich in love for their own families, and the profundity of that desire far excels your bank accounts.

Also, I operate a global criminal drug empire merit more than $300 billion.

Sorry, Jeff! Your place at the top of the world’s wealthiest listing is regrettably meaningless! Even with all your money, gain and affect, you’ll never match how truly rich I feel each and every day of “peoples lives” when I walk into my home and am greeted by my sweet young daughter Alise, my beautiful wife Shannon, and my 75 personal guards armed to the teeth to protect me and all of my narcotics 24/7.

Your wealth pales in comparison to MY riches: a profound desire for my family and likewise my drug empire worth $300 billion.

Of course, I’m sure you’re feeling good today, thinking about where you started and how far you’ve come along on your travel to becoming the world’s wealthiest humankind. Your passion for your business is very admirable. But mark my words, Mr. Bezos: some day soon you are able to look around and know that your $90.6 billion is chump change a hollow, meager number intending nothing when stacked up against the swell of desire in my nerve when two daughters says, “Goodnight Daddy, I love you, ” or my helping hand, Jrgen, tells me, “We have defeated the cartel. You now control all of North America’s major medicine routes.”

I wouldn’t trade a second with my unbelievable family for all the money in your bank account, sir. I also wouldn’t trade it for my own bank account, which has much more money than that in it( because of the drugs ).

This beautiful moment is worth more than your entire net worth. Literally. I retain $92 billion in the lining of the couch I am sitting on. The money is from drugs.

Image: Shutterstock/ Dragon Images

If you’re interested in being genuinely wealthy, Mr. Bezos, I do have some advice for you 😛 TAGEND

Make time for household dinners. Don’t threw work first.

Don’t force everything into the following schedule. Be spontaneous. Take a transgres!

Kill your challengers using paying assassins, and then kill those assassins to embrace your tracks.

Invent a very bad narcotic and sell it for a lot of money.

Taking a stroll with your family is the best investment you are able to build, Jeff. Besides paying off police force so you can run drugs between countries without gain loss, that is.